This post is about how to take chances and forget your fear so you can change your life. Getting bangs was a huge step for me, but putting myself out there with a blog business was uncomfortable and I felt vulnerable.

The choice to get bangs was not pandemically induced. I actually took the leap years ago. But I struggled with the choice before I finally said “just go for it” to my hairdresser. When Laura started cutting away my hair, I couldn’t watch the process as it was happening. But when I looked in the mirror once it was all over, I felt instantly liberated. I mean, I looked amazing. What was I so worried about? This was a rhetorical question though because I knew exactly what I was worried about.

First, I was worried about how I would look to other people.

Among my first thoughts was what would other people think? Would they approve or tell me I made a bad decision? Would they hate it and lie to my face about how good it looks? We spend so much time worrying about what other people think and how other people see us. It’s a need to gain approval from our peers. Yet, we’re not fully accepting our own choices. It’s a need to feel validated that our ideas are good. Yet, we’re not believing in them ourselves. I was basing my decisions and reasoning on what other people thought. I was putting too much value on the opinions of others. Had I let this stop me, I would have missed out on one of the best haircut choices of my adult life. And I wouldn’t be writing this blog and sharing it with all of you.

Second, I was full of fear.

I was too scared to take the leap. I went through a list of what-if questions. What if I regret the decision? What if I end up looking terrible for months? What if I have to learn how to style my hair all over again? I annoyed both myself and Ryan with my constant back and forth. But you know what? The hair will grow back. Just like how we come back from failure if it happens. I took the training wheels off when I cut the bangs and eventually rode straight out of my comfort zone. I decided to take the chance and go for it with other things in my life, including Shatter It.

I realized not going for it, not even trying, was the bigger problem.

How would I fail if I didn’t even try? At some point in my thirties, I shifted my mindset. From bangs to this blog, I have worked towards overcoming things that scare me. I decided that I wanted to see the glass as half full and be more optimistic. I started to turn my thinking more positively because what is there to gain from negativity or what-if questions? I’m sure you already know the answer. A lot of my energy was spent on pointless thoughts and worries when there could have been more focus and energy directed towards Shatter It. Or on literally anything else in my life prior to these revelations.

It doesn’t work every time.

I can’t always convince myself to stay positive, to not get distracted by the what-ifs. To not worry about other people and their opinions, to not seek validation and acceptance outside of my own mind. But I’ve learned to recognize it. I make it a point to change my behavior and change my thinking. I’m learning and growing, but most importantly I am moving past things that would have stopped me before. And I’m thriving. I took a chance on bangs, and then it led me to take a chance on myself.

So take the chance.

It’s not about if you fail. It’s about if you succeed.