The Biggest Lies We Tell Ourselves
How to get out of your own way and stop making excuses. Learn how to turn negative thinking into positive statements with actionable steps to achieve the change you want.
Why do we insist on lying to ourselves?
Because it’s easier than facing the truth.
We cover up these truths with excuses because there is no work involved if we insist there are no solutions.
Basic examples that are the basis for most excuses:
“I can’t do it”
“I don’t have time”
“It’s impossible”
“I don’t know how”
What it really means is you don’t want to put in the work. It’s easier to look for comfort than solutions. It’s easier to spend time seeking validation and finding your own reasons as to why something can’t be done, than really looking at the problem. What you don’t realize is that you have the choice to change your outcomes. But there is something stopping you.
You… you are stopping you.
It’s easier not to think about it. It’s easier to blame outside sources. But you’re forgetting that you have control over your circumstances. You are allowing these excuses to penetrate your thoughts, and it’s holding you back. Instead of the energy you spend on stringing together elaborate excuses, start formulating simple solutions. If you have time for lies, you have time for truths. Free yourself from your self-limiting thoughts.
Real-world examples look like this:
“My whole family is overweight, so I’m destined to be as well” = excuse
“Not in this economy” = excuse
“I don’t make enough” = excuse
“I don’t have the time for anything else” = excuse
How do we stop this self-destruction of our potential?
It comes down to analyzing what you’re choosing to do and comparing it to what your goals are, what you really want out of this life. I bet you wish you had a healthier lifestyle, more time in a day, a nice retirement nest or emergency fund. Stop wishing for it, and do it.
Start by changing the sentence to a more positive one.
I know that the saying is “everything after but is bullshit”, BUT that isn’t the case here.
Once you make positive statements, you want to make actionable steps to get results.
Positive statement: My family is overweight, but I can change the course for myself.
Actionable steps: Make movement a priority every day, even if it’s just walking. Make better food choices. Be consistent. Realize that there could be setbacks but any progress is more than you did yesterday.
Positive statement: The economy isn’t ideal, but where can I make small adjustments to deal with this temporary downturn.
Actionable steps: Educate yourself on what is actually happening instead of only listening to the news whose goal is to sell headlines and scare people. Form a plan to prepare for the current situation. Cut back on discretionary spending and unnecessary purchases.
Positive statement: I don’t make the ideal amount of money I would like to, but if I put $10/week towards investments then I will not only have saved that amount, but I also gain compound interest towards my long-term future.
Actionable steps: Any amount of money will accomplish the goal of saving. If you don’t have $10, make it $5. Don’t have $5, literally a dollar is all it takes. Reevaluate where you are spending your money. I guarantee there’s some there for you to save, but your priorities aren’t allowing you to see it because they are latched onto instant gratification. You can start with coffee at home, drinks in instead of drinking out, or buying a cheaper brand of something you like to eat.
Positive statement: I don’t have the time now, but I could make the time.
Actionable steps: You can wake up 30 minutes earlier or stay up an extra 30. Start with 10 and build up to 30. Instead of scrolling mindlessly through your social media feeds or sending reels and Tik Toks to people, pick up a book, start journaling, or literally do anything you have been pushing off. You do have the time, you just aren’t prioritizing it.
And if you think for a second that none of this is worth it because it’s too minimal in action, then you will just continue to stand in your own way.
Because those steps turn into miles, those facts turn into knowledge, those dollars turn into thousands, those minutes a day turn into more minutes a week. It’s a slow process, but the process turns into a habit, and these habits turn into you leading a happier life. A life of “I’m so glad I did…” versus “I wish I did…”
And I’m guilty of it. Why do you think it took Shatter It so long to grow into something more than an idea? As you’ve read how it all started, there were many years between the inspiration and the establishment. The lie I told myself was that the market is saturated. Followed by the excuses of who would want to listen to me, why would anyone read what I have to say, I wouldn’t be able to stand out. And then I took a hard look at the nonsense I was believing after listening to a podcast.
I don’t remember all the specifics, but it was about bread.
The woman was explaining why the belief that the market is saturated is garbage. She compared it to the bread aisle at the grocery store. Did you ever see how many types there are? But it doesn’t matter because everyone has their favorites. Whether it’s taste, branding, or cost. There is something about the bread that pulls people in. And damn if that comparison didn’t slap me in the face to give me the epiphany I needed. The market is not saturated, I was just afraid to fail. The podcast went on to further assist my revelation. My perspective is unique, my voice is original, I have my own story to tell. Not everyone will relate to me, but there are plenty of people that I will resonate with. And that has proven to be true when I finally took the chance and put myself out there. Women and men reach out to me almost daily to provide me feedback and confirm that my fears were fueled by my own excuses and lies. And now here we are!
So, what are you choosing?
That's really what it comes down to.
What are you actually choosing to do?
Are you deciding that it’s easier to lie to yourself than face the truth?
Are you avoiding finding solutions because it’s easier to use excuses?
Are you going to continue to live a life of coulda, woulda, shoulda?
Or do you want to live a life you are in control of, a life that makes you happy?
Until next time,
