Your Professional Self vs Personal Self
How to stay professional while also staying true to yourself.
And why it is important to remain authentic but to keep boundaries between the two.
This week’s topic is related to professional self vs personal self.
I balance the two, I set boundaries between them, but I always remain authentic.
Easy right? Here is how I do it.
Acknowledge, embrace, share, but filter.
Acknowledge the personality traits that make you who you are. Your hopes, your dreams, your “strengths and weaknesses”, things you are interested in, your quirkiness, and all the things that make you unique and keep you authentic. Embrace both your personal and professional sides and decide what you want to share with those in your professional realm. But make sure you filter it.
Maybe keep anything that would make other people question your integrity and your decision-making to yourself. Those behaviors and actions don’t need to be shared. Because that’s not fair to you or your work reputation. And if we’re being transparent here, people love to pass judgment. I mean, we already have to combat society’s weird view of nurses. From nurse Jackie to cliche Halloween costumes. Don’t give society more reason to give their unsolicited opinions of you as a professional. How you conduct yourself outside of work shouldn’t be a reflection of your professional self. That doesn’t mean that participating in illegal activity or having a complete loss of morals is okay. It means keeping your professional self off your personal self’s social media. You represent your company when you are doing any activities during working hours, or in scrubs, or wearing your badge, or even mentioning where you work.
It also means that if you have fun outside of work, if you make some mistakes outside of work, if you act a little cray cray outside of work, it’s fine. You are allowed to live your best life. You shouldn’t change who you are to fit what you’re expected to be during whatever shift or hours you work. How you are “off the clock” is not a true reflection of you professionally. You are allowed to be yourself, and you are not required, nor expected to keep up with “work you” when you aren’t working. These are all part of your identity, but it is not your whole identity.
Our professional side should just be the “polished” side of our personal self.
Being able to bring your true personality to work is important. It helps you build relationships at work. However, these relationships can just stay at work. You don’t need to take them past the front door of the office, past the end of a meeting call, or past the team-building exercises. You get to choose how you have these relationships, who you have these relationships with, and how much you want to share. You don’t have to be friends with the people you work with in order to have strong relationships with them, and you don’t need to share specific details of your life to be authentic and true to who you are. On the other hand, these relationships can lead to growth opportunities for you, add to your professional network, improve rapport and solidify trust.
You have to learn to adapt and adjust, not change.
We are always adapting and adjusting to our environments. Your professional and personal self do not have to be identical, but they should be similar. It’s not being fake, it’s keeping it real. You aren’t the same person with the grandma who still sees you as a twelve-year-old girl, as you are with your best girlfriend you’ve been slugging tequila with since your early twenties (Liz, I’m looking at young you and me). So why do you need to be an identical woman at work and in your personal life? As long as your core beliefs are aligned, as long as you conduct yourself responsibly, and as long as you are honest with both sides of yourself, you can continue to thrive professionally and personally.
It’s not just about how you act or what you do that you need to be mindful of.
I like to sit back and take it all in, especially when I start a new job or start working with a new team. I assess how they speak in meetings, what they bring to the table, what their personalities are like, how they are as co-workers, and how they treat other people. It helps me to decide how much of my personal self I can share with them. Be cognizant of the same type of people in your professional life as you would in your personal life. You know the type of people I’m talking about. Those that talk more than they listen, those that take more than they give, those who won’t budge on decisions but always expect compromise from others, and those who seek details about you but never reveal any of their own.
If you struggle with reconciling your personal and professional self, maybe you will find these tips helpful:
Find and establish the fine line between your professional and personal self.
Decide who you want to share aspects of your life with, and set those boundaries.
You are not obligated to make friends at work, but you are obligated to be a good human. Build connections, grow your network, and be respectful.
Do some self-awareness and self-checks to make sure you are staying authentic. Are you being true to yourself? Are you endangering any of your core beliefs and values in your personal or professional life?
Always have that filter on. Just as you would an IG photo, slap on a filter when you step into your professional self.
Until next week,
